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Thursday, July 1, 2010

Why is it hard to forgive

It has been a while since I  have written a blog post! This subject is very popular in what I am going to present to the readers and visitors! This is a subject that really people have been looking for true answers for, which is why is it hard to forgive! As for me, I have had struggles previously in this area! My area where I refused to forgive might have been different from yours! Overall, I have been there when it comes to forgiving a person!  My struggles with forgiveness were not easy at all, and that it wasn't an overnight thing at all!

   However, one of the things that we have heard why it's so hard to forgive is due to a pride problem! Depending on the situation, that isn't actually the true reason why it's so hard to forgive in such cases!

Another area  that we have heard that - well, the reason  that we don't forgive because we don't want to; which leads to the abuser having power over you! These are things that we have heard are true,but the majority of us believe that it's a little more to the difficulities to forgive

.Some people say that it's one of the hardest questions to answer! Every thing disclosed on this article is going to be true and honest, and nothing hidden!  I want to begin with the 3 different areas why is it hard to forgive! One of this area could speak to you!


I.  Abused and hurt by the individual or individuals  for years


    A person who has been through intense abuse for years by an  individual for years, it's becomes very hard to forgive!  However, That person will feel those feelings of anger and have questions- why did that person abuse and hurt me for so long!?

Too, if that person sees the individual who abused and hurt him or her! The past memories will flash as lightning in the minds of a person when he or she sees that individual! When that person  has those flashes in their minds- the anger and bitterness will rise up! Sometimes, most people want to get a baseball bat or something to beat the mess out of that individual, that's only if the abuser is in their presence!

 It's due  the amount of years  the damage was done in the past to most people!Most of us  probably have those thoughts of unforgiveness- " Get the hell out of my face! You don't deserve forgiveness!  If  we were alone, Do you know how bad I want to beat your brains out!?


II. That individual has put me through to much

     The second part is a part that I can relate to! When  an individual has put a person through a lot of mess! That person doesn't want to fool with that individual at all! This is because that person will feel that individual took life from him or her!  Sometimes, that person would forgive that individual in what he or she has put him or her through, but  most individuals go back to their old ways! This leads that the individual will put that person through much more mess than before! This will lead to the person not to forgive due to what the individual has put them through!  Sometimes, when an individual has put a person through a lot of mess, that person will do all that he or she can to dodge that individual!

  As for most people, we don't answer their calls, nor return their call at all! Due to the anger that is felt inside! Usually,  Most people's goal is to move far away from that individual until we don't have to deal with them! What they say to other people, " I just want to stay and get away from that person!"  At the same time, they can feel the anger and unforgiveness!


III. Damage of trust
      
      Depending on the situation, this is another area where it can be hard to forgive! Usually, it could be where that individual has damaged that person's trust rather it's cheating, lying, speading lies on that person, sharing secrets that were not supposed to be told, a hidden secret covered as a lie!  When a person's trust has been damaged, it causes the majority not to beleive that person has changed! In other words what goes through that person's mind, " You are through! I am done with this mess! How in the world did you do this!? I trusted you! You went behind my back and did this such thing!  No more second chances with me!" When that person sees that indivdual, that anger can arise to which  he or she doesn't begin a conversation with that individual! It might such as " Hey, how you!" The individual might give the same reponse! At same time, the person's  vibes will tell that individual, "  Don't try and start a conversation! I don't have time for you! You damaged my trust, don't even try! "

  This is the part I can relate to; sometimes,  we forgive  that person for damaging our trust! Inwardly, we have not forgiven them because we want to get out of our presence!


Final word!

I want to say to those who are dealing with unforgiveness! I know how it feels  when it comes to the difficulity of forgiveness! This is why I love talking about this area! Remember your healing to forgiveness takes time, it's not always an overnight thing! If you have any more questions concerning forgiveness, you can look under the category under forgiveness! If you want to talk to me! Contact me by e-mail!


Too, if you want to read more about difficulites with forgiving! Come purchase my book "Why it's so hard to forgive those who hurt us!






Until the next blog! Be safe! Have a blessed evening!




Copyright (©) by Tyler J.Logan
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