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Saturday, May 1, 2010

Not another "change your thinking" towards life blog- Part II

   Having spoken from  the previous post or article,  I want to go a little deeper into this subject! As some of the readers probably wondered," why I do such an article!" My reason is because I have experienced this type of situation, and it took time  for me to change my thinking towards life, and to forgive also! My previous situation and circumstances probably might not have been the same as another person, but I can relate to those who cannot adjust to change their view towards life.
   In my previous years, I have been asked by some people, " How is life?"   I would say okay, but inwardly I was not honest  to them!  My reason for not telling them  the truth because I knew most people would not truly understand, or have not gained my trust, or they would say statements to do  that might seemed right and positive ,but didn't help!  

 I. Is this bogus stuff

        Most people who been through a lot of intense hell and  situations in life, most of them go for help to change the way that they think! The main things that they are told, " Be postive in those situations!  Change your way of thinking towards life!Suck it up!" Even though it might seem encouraging and uplifiting, it doesn't be  as a help to most of them ! Most people who has been through  intense hell  in their lives, they don't want to hear- " be strong in the trial  -or -" continue to be  positive through the intense situation!" The reason because they are weary and tired! Most people  rather have a person whom they have built trust with , and truly can relate to how they are feeling!  After building that level of trust,  most individuals tell what is going on in their lives and express how they are feeling!

  Some people are probably saying, " This is hogwash and bogus! What are you talking about? You're just tried to keep a person way from being positive!?" No! Not at all!Some people might think I am wrong for saying this, but let's look at this!

II. Positive people who don't feel   Vs. Positive people who can relate

 1.Positive people who don't feel

Even though  most people  can be very positive about life, but they are not used to being around a person who has spoken what he or she has been through! Overall, it makes them feel un ease and have an uncomfortable feeling when they hear the testimony of another person who has been through a lot of things! Sometimes, they are not used to watching shows or movies that other people have been through! When a positive person who does not feel, they give reactions towards a person who has been through,or is going through intense hell on earth.

  Whenever they hear a person opening up about present or previous circumstances- the reactions of most people probably will be as, " You must learn to be positive! Stop thinking the wrong way about life! Get over it, suck it up, and enjoy life! Be encouraged! I know how you feel! Change the way you think towards life! " That person is saying in their  mind, " They don't  care how I expressed myself so why listen to them?! They need saying to me, [ I know how you feel] - they are such liars! They are just taking the same old self-help ideas just as everybody else! They person cannot relate!"  However,  their minds don't adjust to that because they are looking for some book or some person that will truly  speak and relate directly to their situation.

   In contrast,  the people who are postive who cannot feel, they don't carefuly discern their audience! It's understandable if a person is making you uncomfortable by not letting you be yourself,  but I am not talking about that! I am talking about a person who desire for a person listen and relate to!

   2. Positive people who can relate

    Some people might find it very difficult to believe that there are people who have been through a lot, but turned out to be positive towards life! With a lot of them, it wasn't an overnight process!

 Overall, they have a deep compassion  and can truly relate to people who has been through a lot of things in life! They are very understandable people who know and discern their audience very well!  They don't approach a person very quickly by saying," Be positive towards life!Be encouraged and lifted! Be strong!" They know that person needs  a trusted individual! They also know that type of ecouragement or uplifting don't work!  This reason because they have experienced so much of it!  They truly understand when certain individuals say, " Life doesn't make sense to me! I don't trust a lot of people! When are things going to get better! I am tired of going through intense hell every day or week of my life!'" 

   Contrary from that,  individuals who have built that trust level with a person , they don't mind expressing their feelings about life towards him or her! A person who listens, relate, and  truly cares about those individuals;  the same individuals will speak to themselves, " this person really relate to my situation ! This person is not as others! This person! I would like to know them ! This person is not going by old self-help qurks! This person listens to me in how I feel!   This person is for real! I can trust this person!This person has truly help me because they can truly relate to me!" 

Over time, they will not mind listening to that person! Next, that person can present to them of how to have a positive mindset towards life! Those  people will not mind listening  because of the level of trust that has been gained there! Even though it might have not been the same similiar situation, but that person can  still relate to their situation.

Final word

Always be sure of the type of audience and know what you are dealing with! Unitl the next blog, be safe, be encouraged! Have a great  and  blessed day!

Copyright(©) by Tyler J.Logan
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