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Thursday, April 8, 2010

"Assuming" what it can cause in families

      In this message,  this is something probably most families can relate to! This is the word " assume"! In today's society, a lot of us have heard of that word !  This term will be focused on families as a whole in general! Majority of  family members have a habit of assuming  towards each other , which it has become very common thing! Before going into the part one of the subject, I want to present to the readers the meaning of the word "assume"!

  Assume - take to be the case or to be true; accept without verification or proof!

  
   I.  What happens when members in the family assume

           Overall, when family members assume about another relative, there begins great confusion and strife  in the family!  Most family members go upon false assumptions about a relative, which is not even true! Whenever family members are assuming things about their relative, they are either angry, or bitter, or holding a grudge from what that person had done to them in the past.  When  familes assume,  it can destroy and affect other members of the family!

Nevertheless, most family members will assume something about another relative in their mind! Usually, they have not had any contact  with that particular relative to talk to him or her face to face about what is going on in their life! To add to that, majority of family members will assume things about a particular relative or more that they haven't heard nor seen in years or mouths! Then too, most family members will gather around and start gossiping about that particular relative!

Or sometimes, most family members will get on the phone to start gossiping by their assumptions of a particular relative! Too, there is one relative who hears the gossip by other family members rather it be in a circle, or on the telephone--that one relative  will probably think, " Is that really true in what they are saying about my relative?! I know that they haven't seen them in years, mouths, or weeks!"  Due to the assumptions by other family members, that one relative will probably have perceived in their mind of how that person really is!
     
      Or sometimes, that one relative will contact that family member to see if it's true or not! A lot of  times when that one relative contacts that family member in order to find out, he or she doesn't find it to be true from what other relatives spoke! While that one relative gets to know their niece, nephew, cousin, brother, sister, mother, father, uncle, or aunt,  that one relative will probably speak this common statement, " As I have  gotten to know you well,  you were not like what the family said that you are!"  After they have gotten to know each other well, one will probably say, " Now you see why I stay away from our folks! They always assume stuff rather than asking!"

     In contast, most relatives will be mad at those family members who assumed things!  Other relatives will just say in their minds, " Well, that's common in my family! That's no suprise to me!"  They will not think about it anymore!


         II. Clear up confusion

        The best way to clear up confusion from what other members of the family say about a relative-- go and find out for yourself  about that relative!Don't always go by the assumptions of other family members because it's not good!  It's important to get to know that relative and ask questions to see if it's true or not!  Majority of relatives will prove to that person  that it's not true!  This will allow a person to see that relative in a postive way! Too,  it will probably cause that relative to have a good relationship with that member of the family! 

         Sometimes, most people will have certain family members don't want to open up, when they want to clear up the confusion!  This means certain family members want their trust to be earned, not abused! With most family members, it's going to take trust before they begin to open up! The reason that certain have their guard up because they know most of their family members will go gossip to other relatives!

Before  most people ask questions to clear up confusion, she or he probably have to discern that relative to see if they need to earn their trust! When trust has been earned, then most people can start asking questions in order to clear up confusion Most family members will not open up right way, which is understandable! In addition, Most people have the mentality that certain members must tell them, which is true! Depending on what it is, trust has to be earned!


 Final word

     I want to give to readers! It's important to never to assume something about a relative if you have not seen him or her in mouths or years!! It's necessary to  find out and witness for yourself about that relative in order to see if it's true or not!

     Until the next blog, I hope everyone stay safe! Be inspired!Be encouraged! Be very blessed! Have a great day and evening!



Copyright (©) by Tyler J.Logan


     




 
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