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Wednesday, February 17, 2010

The struggles to Forgive

Forgiveness is one of my most favorite topic to talk about!  The focus is going to be towards people who have  struggled to forgive. Forgiving is sometimes not easy due to the amount of damage that has been done in the past.  It becomes an emotional  and mental battle from the soul and spirit.

  In contrast, the ego of society has  presented that forgiveness suppose to  happen overnight, and it's not a stuggle nor a process! Are you kidding me? Forgiveness doesn't happen overnight with every person! Society must understand that some people have been through  deep emotional damage!

 From my own experiences, forgiveness didn't happen very fast in my life! It took me years  to forgive and heal from the hurts and  pains of my past! I extremely struggled to forgive and was very good at holding grudges!

 Whenever I saw the person or more who hurt me,that anger  and bitterness would arise in my mind  so quick! I didn't want to fool with  them! I would be so mad to which  I wanted to rage out! I would be saying in my mind, " I wish you would say something foolish to me so that  I can act crazy!  Get the hell out my life, I don't want to see you!"

My struggles to  forgive were not very easy at all. One would ask me! Was it more than one person? The answer is "yes"! It was not easy to forgive them, but I overcame it!  The way  I overcame my struggle is by crying! I mean crying from the gut! It was an process that happened off and on, but my healing didn't happen overnight! My cries from the gut felt that something was coming out of my soul, which I knew that it was the process of releasing my pains of the past!  This is how I truly healed from a lot of my pains of the past!

To say to the viewers, every person has a different way to heal! As I spoke what worked for me during my struggle to forgive, will probably not work for you! Find what is best for you  is what I am saying! It's okay to do what I did, but if you are only confident that it will work for you! After finding  what works for you, it will be your way to overcome your struggle to forgive!
    To all of those who have struggled to forgive, I have been there in this area! I know what it's like to be told the statement -" Well  you have to confront that person!"  Even though I took action doing that statement with one of the persons who hurt me, it made the situation much worse and then made me more angry and bitter to which I got the phone to talk about what happened! That situation caused me to struggle more to forgive! Overall,  I learned a huge lesson about confronting  that  particular person!

   In addition, the lying and deceptive statement from what society says  to do is - everyone must confront the person who hurt him or her in order to heal from the past! Under that statement, this is what  they are truly telling every person these things below.

1.Don't think about what type of situation  you're getting to!

2 It's okay to confront without using proper and correct wisdom!

3. It's always work with every person!

4.  Even though  that person or more hurt you,  go confront without being aware of the situation !

    Society don't understand that most people are so damaged emotionally, which confronting the abuser will allow most people  to be more bitter and angry than before! It also causes most people to struggle more to forgive!  To add to that subject, the next and last common statement that a lot of us have heard - "Get over it"! This statement is spoken to most  people who have  extremely struggled to forgive! Even though that is a true statement, but  it can be dangerous!

Most people who extremely struggle to forgive, they will see that as an insult! This will cause most people  to be more angry and bitter, which the struggle will cause them to have a harder time  to forgive! Their minds usually speaks, " I have opened to this person and he or she doesn't understand what I am feeling inwardly! I will be more careful of who I open to next time !  I trusted this person,but I know next time not to open up  again to him or her! I opened up to that person so that I could release what was bothering  me inwardly in order for to heal, I am probably not doing it nomore!"  These feelings go through the minds of most people!

 Contrary from that,  those who are struggling with forgiveness! I know how it feels to struggle with forgiveness! Although our situations  are different, but we can relate to struggling to forgive. To end with a closing statement, healing is sometimes a process! Until the next blog, I want to say to readers to be safe, be encouraged, and  have a great day and evening!

Copyright(©)by Tyler J.Logan
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