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Friday, January 22, 2010

Confronting the person who hurt you- the convincing- part-III

Part three of this subject is going to be a little different from the first two parts! This part is going to connect with the subject,which it's going to be sort of the opposite,but it will still talk about confronting. The third part will deal with convincing! This means that most people beg and try to recieve forgiveness from the person whom they hurt in the past.

 In simple terms, the abuser coming to ask for forgiveness from the person. Overall, one can see that most people confront that person whom they hurt! Before most people confront and beg for forgiveness from the person whom they hurt,there is always revelation that comes to them in what they have done in the past!

Even though most people have recieved a revelation of what they have done to a person, but they also have learned how to use wisdom.One would ask," What do I mean by wisdom in this case!?" These abusers must put themselves in that person's situation of how badly he or she has been wounded by them! These abusers must think " how long they have damaged and hurt that person? Has it been for years, or a day!?" If these people have hurt that person for years,they must understand that it's going to take time with that person to accept an apology.

 Overall,the abuser must understand most people are not ready to see him or her face-to-face! Too, most people are not prepared to hear an apology because they have been severely damaged emotionally! The first question an abuser probably ask, " When will the person whom I hurt be ready for my apology!?" I am going to give an honest answer to this question!

Before most abusers take the next step to apologize and beg for forgiveness, they must learn how to listen to that strong gut feeling of knowing when it's time to apologize! Some abusers will probably feel a heaviness on their conscious know that they need to apologize to that person. Why does this happen? The person who has been hurt is waiting on their apology, which their conscious or that gut feeling is leading some abusers to apologize so that things can be resolved!

 Either way, the strong gut-feeling or that heaviness will let the abusers know when it's time to confront and apologize to that person. The timing makes a big difference!! Without using wisdom and knowing the timing, this will lead the person who has been hurt not to give their abuser an apology nor forgiveness!This leads to the situation to be worse! So many abusers don't allow themsleves to be lead by that strong gut feeling or wait for a heaviness on their conscious to come! Most of them will think that it's not on them, but on the person who is hurt!Note! Here are some things of why did the abuser confrontation fail?

1. It was not the right timing

2. Taking matters in their own hands without being strongly lead by that strong-gut feeling or having a heaviness on their conscious

3. Not putting themselves in that person's shoes

4. Not having a relevation that how long they serevely hurt the person

5. Some of them know deep inside of their hearts that it's not time to ask for an apology by their gut feeling, but they do it anyway!

However, the aspects of confronting must be used wisely! With most people who have been hurt, an apology or confrontation might not be the right healing method for them. This is very hard for a lot of people to understand, but it's true. Most people are not healed by an apology so that forgiveness can start in their life! Remember, a person has to find what works for them and everyone is different!

Until the next blog! Every one be safe and have a great day and evening!

Copyright(©)by Tyler J.Logan
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